Holding

This is a beautiful image. I understand the loneliness you feel. And I am having a difficult time right now. One day I meditated and had a very strong sense of having my head in the lap of a very kind and loving mother who stroked my hair. I'm thinking of you.

Paul, this is a sweet image and a good thing for you to focus on. There is a real world out there with people who love you and beautiful moments. It's waiting for you when you're ready. Hope you are back soon.
love and peace

Thanks! Yes, I think this image is soothing too. The hospital is always harder than I expect. And always different. It's definitely not a country club experience, by any measure. In fact, what it more is about is increased activation of parts and finding ways to contain that while at the same time learning something about myself that I can only learn inpatient. This is difficult and very taxing.

Hi Paul,

It sounds like a lot of work. I know that it will bring you healing progess, as you work so hard at it when you are there.

I love the photo. It is a great image. I will be thinking of that in the near future. Thanks.

Good and healing thoughts to you.

Kate

There is something so beautiful and touching about small hands holding something that is even smaller and so delicate.

Sometimes you need to be held in order to be able to hold others. Please be as gentle on yourself as you can.

Sending positive thoughts your way
Michelle

I often have many of the same feelings.

Paul,
This is a beautiful and touching post. Thank you for sharing this lovely image with us.
Thinking of you.
Vicki

I loved this picture because it brought a bit of my childhood to memory. I grew up on a farm and would often play with the baby geese and ducks. My mother gave me the milk bucket filled with water and I would drop the baby ducks into the water and they would begin to paddle like crazy up to the surface. Once I lifted them out, they shook and then snuggled up under my chin.

Yes, it's nice to get a hug, and I love to give baby things hugs, too.

How long are you going to be in the hospital? I hope not long, I'm sorry you are there.

Paul, I am glad you are in hospital if that is where you need to be. I have found hospital stays grueling but ultimately profoundly fruitful. So much depends on one's commitment to the work. You deserve to be healthy and happy. You deserve to take the time you need. You will be a better parent if you can parent yourself first.

Personally, I have struggled with the need to self-parent: it isn't fair; my parents should have loved me and protected me and not given me over to a known abuser; I should have been nurtured and held. But I wasn't. So now my adult self has to parent my child selves. It isn't fair but I know that it is possible and it helps. I wrote a story about it called, "The Fairly-Good Mother." I will post it as a page on my website: monav.wordpress.com. It is light-hearted but you might get something from it.

Be well; hold your child-self close.

Mona

Paul,
I've had a bad week. Everything I touched, I dropped, spilled, or broke. I've managed to get thru another family betrayal. It all made me think of you, in the hospital. Somehow, my problems now seem less.

I just wanted to come by and wish you my best and hope you are getting to play the piano and get to see your kids. I really hope you are getting the help you need and will be back soon.

Hugs and healing wishes,
Ivory

Safe holding hugs, Paul.

I hope that you find your way home with a natural rhythm!

Paul

So sorry to hear you're in the hospital. It sounds like hard work, but I hope that brings healing. I also hope you are able to find some moments of peace there. Please take care.

What a lovely image. Thank you for sharing.

Kerro

Hi, Paul -

My thoughts and prayers are with you. I'm proud of you . . that you are taking care of yourself and making your healing a priority.

- Marie (Coming Out of the Trees)
http://mmaaggnnaa.wordpress.com/

Thinking of you, Paul.