Chopin Prélude No. 4

| By Paul | | Comments (6)

I have had a difficult time writing publicly. I am not sure why that is. It may be that when I start to write, I realize I have said something quite similar before. I cannot stand not being original! I think they call that writer's block or not being very creative. I am not really sure.

Lately, however, my music has been original and creative.

A couple of years ago I would cringe to record, let alone share, me playing classical music. That is not the case now. In many ways I was stymied by the expectation that performing classical music be precise. That was how I was taught. No teacher ever told me that it was all right to "interpret" the music in my own way.

So I did that on my own, in private. And when I had lessons, I tried to play it "right", as the teachers "expected".

There is a life lesson in there.

In so many areas of life, we are taught to not be creative. Creative students are often looked at as nerds by other students. They sometimes make their teachers feel uncomfortable. They are different. They stand out.

Sports are probably one area where one is almost always positively rewarded for being creative. If you get the basketball in falling backwards, shooting with your non-dominant hand, as the opposing team fouls you, you're a hero.

However, if you make a painting that doesn't look like any of the other kids in class or you know π to 100 places, well that's most likely a different story. And that's unfortunate.

Not only did I have to hide the fact that I "interpreted" classical music in my own way, but it has taken me a long time to share it with others. I think that is because I have trouble sharing something this personal about myself. In this piece, for example, my emotions are directly attached to the music.

The Chopin Prélude No. 4 is probably the most emotive classical piano piece I have ever heard.

There is also a lesson about healing.

I believe healing from deep emotional wounds also requires creativity. Often, the problems we face are just too large to be solved by "one size fits all" approaches. Ultimately each of us learns that if our commitment to healing is solely going to therapy once a week, we will probably not heal.

Each of us must find out own path, whatever that is. Some of us may find healing in riding horses, in a certain type of yoga, in a sport, in art, in an intellectual pursuit, in love.

And that path is unique to each of us, which by definition makes it creative.

6 Comments


Evan said:

I absolutely agree.

castorgirl said:

Hi Paul,

Thank you for sharing your creativity with us. It's such a beautifully emotive piece...

I'd go so far as to say that we won't heal, or learn life's lessons, by following a script established by someone else. We can learn from that script; but it's much like learning the basics of anything, before needing to break the rules with our creativity, and taking it to the next level. We can learn the language of what we struggle with, and it can be helpful, until it's not. We can look at the different models of healing, and find aspects which suit us... This is about being an individual. Each individual is special, and will need tailored solutions. There will be some common ground, but some that's not.

The problem can be, as you say, doing things because the teacher/expert expects it; rather than because it is what we need to do. It can be difficult to sort through those messages...

Take care,
CG

wantstorun said:

Paul,

Thank you for sharing your piano, I enjoyed it very much.

This is not the first time that you've mentioned your struggle to write publicly; perhaps, for a time, that form of healing isn't meant for you.

Also, because something has been said before, or is similar to something from another time, does not mean it isn't useful. The mixed up messages that were passed along during our trauma weren't things said just once and then forgotten. They were repeated, often; sometimes, we still hear similar messages in society today. My healing definitely requires that I say/hear things repeatedly.

Take good care,

wtr

tiredtoo said:

Thank you for creating a blog for those, like yourself, to read & listen to who find creativity helps soothe the traumas of the past. Beautiful piece.

OneSurvivor said:

I think it is better to interpret things creatively...to be uniquely expressive.

Thank you for sharing this beautifully played piece of music.

Paul said:

I know I am a terrible blog host for just now getting around to thanking you for your comments! Thank you Evan, CG, WTR, TiredToo, and OneSurvivor!

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This page contains a single entry published on June 24, 2012 11:58 PM.

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